And it did. Let's work backwards, shall we???
Thursday: He wanted brownies for his birthday treat at school. Not store bought, had to be home-made by mom. Check. Brownies made and delivered.
Friday: He wanted a chocolate cake with chocolate icing. Also had to be home-made. Check. Spent all day making the damn thing and all day the day before making the damn brownies but check. I made them. And not to be outdone, Lizzy wanted a WHITE cake. Homemade. And I made that and checked it of my list too.
Friday: He wanted a bouncy house. Yeah. A full fledged bouncy house that's like 50 by 100 feet and needs a small generator to run. Um, yeah. No.
But then the requests got more and more elaborate.
"I want to eat Pho for dinner." Pho is this Vietnamese soup that takes like four hours to make. Read: its a total pain in the ass.
"And then I want Spring Rolls too." The spring rolls take an additional three hours to make. Read: an even bigger pain in the ass.
Seeing how it was the day before his birthday and I needed to go to the Asian store to get all the supplies I was starting to get a little short of breath. There was not enough time.
"And I want to go to Power Play in the afternoon." Power Play is a kids zone that has bouncy houses and other stuff like shoot-em-up games, mini-roller coasters and a pizza place.
"And I want to go to Tae Kwon Do in the morning."
"And can I open a present now?"
"No, you may not open a present. It's not your birthday yet. We need to talk about how all of this is going to play out tomorrow hon, I'm not sure we can do ALL the stuff you want in one day. Maybe we can eat something else for dinner?"
And then it happened. Pear-shaped. He had a huge meltdown Friday night. I had hoped that Saturday would be a new day and his bad temper would pass. It did not.
Saturday he woke up saying: "It's my birthday. I WANT PHO FOR DINNER. If I can't then fine, FINE. I'm going to take all the decorations down and NOT HAVE MY BIRTHDAY. IF I CAN'T HAVE ANY FUN THEN NO-ONE ELSE WILL HAVE ANY FUN EITHER. No-one else is going to have fun on MY birthday. IT'S MY BIRTHDAY! ARGGGG!!!"
And all the screaming, crying, yelling, hitting, kicking, stomping and banging ensued. Along with all the streamers and other party decorations being un-ceremoniously yanked off the walls and torn to bits. BITS.
And that right there is why we have every dresser, bookshelf and large object bolted to the walls in our house. Had they not been secured, they would have come crashing down. I am sure of it.
Its amazing how strong a newly minted eight year old can be.
Anyway, I'm not proud to say this but here it is: I snapped.
I yelled back at him something along the lines of, "I know its your birthday. I get it. But there are other people in this family. Our world does not revolve around you. You want to have a bad day? Then FINE, have a bad day. You want ME to have a bad day? Well FINE, I'm having a bad day. I'M HAVING SUCH A BAD DAY, I'M LEAVING. LEAVING. Your plan to have a bad day worked. IT WORKED. Are you happy now???"
And with that, I left. Left him standing there in total shock, crying and not understanding anything other than I had snapped like a twig on his birthday.
I went for a run. I damn near killed myself but I ran. Ran from everything in the house. Ran from him. Ran from Autism and ran from everything that I wanted for him that didn't happen. And most of all, I ran from myself. Ran from my shitty temper, my anger and my own expectations I had for the day. I ran.
And then I came back.
And we went to Tae Kwon Do.
And we went to Power Play. We ate their horrible pizza, minus the cheese, with sauce on the side.
And we bounced in the bouncy house till I thought we were going to see the pizza again.
And OH MY GOD, they have Wheel of Fortune. THEY HAVE WHEEL OF FORTUNE!!!
And lockers. THEY HAVE LOCKERS! LOOK MOM THEY HAVE LOCKERS!!!
And we had Pho. And cake. And presents. No spring rolls though. I know he knows we didn't have them but he didn't say anything.
And at the end of the day, the sun and moon did rise and set with my little boy, in our little universe.
Happy Birthday little one.