A meme. Be afraid, very afraid.

I was going to write some more about our wonderful adventures in Spring Break Land but like many places you go, it's over rated.  Quite frankly, without my kids in a Tae Kwon Do camp this week I just may have thrown myself out an upper window by now.  I think I've discussed this before and while jumping out the window may impart some bodily harm, it wouldn't be enough for me to get out of making dinner.  The cost benefit analysis deems it necessary I stay within the confines of my house.  Dammit.

My good friend Kelly over at Unplanned Trip to Holland tagged me in a Meme.  I'm never quite sure how to feel about these things.  I love to read other's view on Meme's but truth be told, these things are a lot of work with all the tagging and linking but I love them just the same.  Yes, I am that lazy.  

In short order, here are the rules of the game:

1. Thank and link back to the person who bestowed the award on you.  Check.  Kelly, Kelly, Kelly..click here to find Kelly.
2. Post 10 things about yourself that others may or may not know. 
3. Nail 6 others with this award. 
4. Go find those 6 others and let them know you've given them the computer equivalent of Type A influenza.   

Now before y'all go running down to the bottom of the page I'll start with the ten things you may or may not know about me.  THEN, you can all go run down to the bottom of the page.

Aw, fuck it.  

Here are my people I'm tagging.  Who am I kidding?  We all want to know who I'm going to crucify and hang out to dry.  In no particular order, except for Flannery, here you go.  

1. Flannery over at Living on the Spectrum: The Connor Chronicles.
2. Peg at Straight up-No Chaser.  
3. Allie from Little Baby Fields.
4. Karen at Ow, my angst. 
5. Andrea over at Maybe it's just me...
6. Insert your name here if you think the Meme's got your name on it.  

Flannery always gets nailed when I do a meme.  One day she's going to come up to Kansas City and kick my ass, like seriously, the way they do in Fight Club.  She's going to beat me to a pulp and turn me into soap.  When the blog goes silent, you'll know that's happened but until then I will tag her.  Relentlessly.  I call it tradition.  She calls it a, "horrendous pain in her ass, a boil that needs to be lanced, a...."   

Now on to the ten things you may or may not know about me.  

1. I detest when other people in my family are sick.  I can't stand to hear them cough, sick-up or act like they are dying.  The fact that He Who Shall Not Be Named is still sick and carrying on like a wounded dove is driving me right over the edge.  To say, "Every time he coughs, a little piece of me dies inside, " is not stretching the truth.  Hurry the hell up and get better already or die.  I don't care which but just turn the corner one way or the other.        
2. I'm Type A all the way.  I can't stand to have a messy, dirty floors.  When I first saw Sleeping With the Enemy I was all, "Ohhhh, look now nice and clean their house is!  Look at how he lines up all the canned goods and see, who doesn't like their bathroom towels all neat and orderly?"  Sure, he was certifiably insane but I'd place money you could eat off those floors.  He'd beat you for it later, of course, but you'd have a full belly.    
3. Tamiflu made me sicker than a dog.  To the point that I had to preform several complete colon cleanses.  One of them was at my son's allergy appointment.  Since I had to drag him into the bathroom with me, he almost got sick because I was sick and I had horrible visions of him puking between my legs while I was on the toilet.  Think that sounds disgusting?  Try living it.     
4. I pretend not to be a bitch but I really am.  I judge people and I like to make fun of my neighbors.  I try not to but seriously, how long is that tree going to stay dead in your yard?  Its been there for two years and let me tell you a little known fact about trees---they stay dead.  Cut the damn thing down already.   
5. I am hypoglycemic as hell right now so I have to stop and come back before I pass out from low blood sugar.  Yeah, I know it's from eating cake and coffee this morning but when presented with the option of a piece of cake or a fruit salad, the cake wins every single time.  
6. I'm sick of my stats and really need to stop looking at them but it's like crack.  I have to go back and look.  I try to stop but I just can't.  And don't get me started on the 'Join this site' and 'Members' and all of that.  I don't know who I'm following and who's following me and what the proper etiquette is anymore.  I mean, what if you follow them and they don't follow you back?  That means they think you suck, right?  Do you then go back and un-follow?  I mean, that's a little rude don't you think?  And then if you subscribe to an e-mail feed with someone on WordPress should they follow you on Blogger?  Seriously, somebody help me with this one.  
7. I'm using an old razor right now and the only time I remember to replace it is when I'm buck-naked in the shower.  I'm too lazy to get out of the shower to replace it so I've been butchering my legs for over a week now.  
8. I love to bake but the thought of making dinner every night makes me weak at the knees because, you know, we all eat one well-rounded meal full of fresh produce and lovely vegetables.  And if you can't read the sarcasm in that, then I just can't help you.  
9. Everything I wrote in that first paragraph is a lie.  I'm secretly enjoying everything about Spring Break.  Except Daylight Savings.  I want to punch that ass-hat in the nuts.  
10. I wish I didn't have to fake-name it here and it bugs me more than you will ever know.  

I'm sure I could do more than ten things but I think that's sufficient to have your hand over your mouth in horror so I'll stop there.  

Now I'm off like a virus to go infect some more people....