Monday, September 17, 2012

I'm learning to live with Dragons in our house.

We have a new love in our house, it's iThing related.  Every love affair in this house is iThing related.  I lay the blame squarely at my husbands feet.  Usually when I go out for a bit and wonder the aisles of Walmart or Target for some alone time (don't judge me) he has to fend for himself with the kids.

His fending for himself involves a movie, the Wii or a new app/game on the iThing's.  They all have a good time and when I get back home, the house is reasonably unharmed so I go with it.  I've learned to pick my battles around here and if he's watching the kids, I don't raise a fuss unless there's a hole in the wall or a tent in the back yard.

Both of which have happened, don't ask.  

Anyway, when I came back from the store, my phone was whisked out of my hand and had DragonVale installed in a matter of seconds.  Seconds.

You smug little Wizard you.  

From that moment forward, I have had no peace.  None.  We've been talking about dragons all day, all night, all the time.

"Mom, did you see I have a Cold Dragon?  Lizzy doesn't have one.  Hey Lizzy, guess what kind of dragon I have?  I have a COLD DRAGON!"  Alex screams, happy as a clam he has a new dragon and mindless of the shit-storm Lizzy's going to unleash because she doesn't have a Cold Dragon.

"What?!  You have a Cold Dragon?!?  That's so not fair!  Mom, that's not fair!  I wanted a Cold Dragon!  That's not fair!!!" she wails, stomping around the house in a huff, bound and determined to make our lives miserable.

I would like to say it's stopped there.  It has not.  Lizzy's been bent out of shape ever since.

Until.

Until there was a promotion and DragonVale had this thing where you could enter and possibly receive a Sapphire Dragon.  The to die for dragon.  The dragon to beat all other dragons.

Long story short:  Lizzy got one, Alex did not.  I will save you the histrionics, meltdowns and furor that has been unleashed in this house.  Lizzy is good at payback and lets just say she's paid back, in full.

The Pandora's box of DragonVale.

Have I mentioned the fury/angst/horror that has been unleashed because Alex didn't get a Sapphire Dragon?  I have???  It bears repeating.  It's brought me to my knees.

I've had to write not one, but two letters, into school letting them know what's going on.  Something along the lines of:

"Alex is coming in to you very upset because he's not received the Sapphire Dragon in DragonVale.  I thought you should know so you can break him accordingly.  I don't know what DragonVale is either.  In other related news, tell Lizzy congrats."

I thought this was a one day event.  Lizzy got her dragon, end of story.

Not so.

Apparently the damn thing had to hatch.  See, in DragonVale they gave the eggs out as the promotion.  They still had to incubate and then the dragons hatch the next day.  

So I had to send in another letter, the next day:

"Another rough AM here.  Apparently the dragons of DragonVale need to hatch.  Lizzy's Sapphire Dragon hatched this AM sending Alex into another meltdown.  In other related news, I'm going insane and I hate dragons."

At one point I called my husband and it went a little something like this, "What in the fuck- fuck-fuck is DragonVale?  Wait, don't answer that.  Just tell me how we get Alex a Sapphire Dragon.  Can you gift it to him or something?  WAIT, WHAT?!?  IT COSTS $100!!!  Real America dollars?!?  Are you shitting me?!?   You have to fix this honey, I can't handle another morning like this."  

Yeah, turns out DragonVale was promoting these gems because they're fucking expensive.  The only way Alex could get the coveted dragon, was if I play and gift him gems. When he gets enough gems he can get a Sapphire Dragon.  

That was last week.

I've set strict limits on the kids iThings and we're somewhat back to normal.  Turns out, Alex was gifted another dragon as part of the promotion which is valuable in its own rights, so he's happy.

My very own Dragon Island.

The problem is, I've been sucked into DragonVale.  I've managed to get up to level 12 and I want the Sapphire Dragon.  Someone give me some gems would you?  I want that damn egg.

I gotta go, I have to pick which dragons I want to fight in the Colosseum.    

29 comments:

  1. Bahahahaha! They got you good!

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  2. Where is the game besides the iThings? We are a no iThing household, but I try to help out my fellow gamers.

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    Replies
    1. I don't know!!! There are days when I just want the ithings to go away.....

      Delete
  3. oh my goodness.
    and here i thought my life was complete - WRONG. I have no dragons of any gems and no ithings.
    what a loser!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bwahhh!!! No Peg, I think you are the smartest one out of the whole lot!!!!

      Delete
  4. Good luck with getting the dragons and storming the colosseum. This sounds like something that would happen here...ha!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah and now I need a new island and a new hatchery and.......

      Delete
  5. Thank Jehovah we're still only playing Where's Perry and the Ninjago game, because hissy fits over dragons is not in my morning plan!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LIke finding Perry was hard enough, right?!? Are you sure??? I can friend you on GameCenter....

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  6. That's one thing about the iPad. Everything has a price attached to it. Even games hat are 2.99 still hav many other things to buy for 1.99. So a 3 dollar game ends up costing about $20.

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    Replies
    1. I know!!! The good thing with this game is that you don't have to spend any money, if you don't want to. All the dragons and eggs can be obtained if you're willing to wait. We've spent zero dollars on the game outside the $0.99 initial purchase. We're trying to teach the kids patience but it's killing me more than them!!!

      Delete
  7. yay Dragon vale says a happy little voice right beside me...
    Good luck with your sapphire dragon :)

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  8. Sorry I cannot contribute to the depravity that goes on in the Lizbeth household... no Dragonvale here. Toots just hasn't found it yet. When (not if) we join you though, I will save up some gems (?) to trade because I'm certain I will need some high maintenance dragons... ;)

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  9. Wait, so is this like pokemon with dragons? Is it bad that this post made me want this game?

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    Replies
    1. Totally like pokemon with dragons...and I have to go get more gems...

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  10. My head is spinning.... no way am I going to even look at that app!

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  11. Ok, the last time Alex sucked you into a game (ahem...Spice Bandits) I then got sucked into for months. Sigh. I'm gonna get sucked into this one too aren't I?

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  12. I am SO glad this crap came along later than my kids. I've never gotten into any of these games. And I avoid facebook games like the plague.

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  13. How much do I love those letters to the school? Oh, just soooooo much!

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  14. We have the boredom but not the battles here... Only my son plays all these games, but the rest of us know them pretty intimately too :)

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  15. Woman, if I get sucked into the lunacy of this game under the guise of helping you out (cuz you know I want to)...who will do the laundry and cooking? Ah...I have minions who I am sure will gladly do my/our dino bidding!

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  16. I'm bend out of shape because I can't ask about the tent in the backyard. ;)

    Seriously, you should write a book. You are a good writer AND funny. I'd buy it! Just sayin'.

    ReplyDelete
  17. The tent seems far more reasonable than 100 dollars for a game. WTH?

    I am worried about the day when PBSkids.org isn't good enough anymore. I don't have 100 bucks for a game. WTH am I gonna do? Get a job? F that;D

    ReplyDelete
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