Monday, October 15, 2012

I blame it on the root-beer floats.

Last week was a hard week for us.  Filled with meltdowns, angst, and general anxiety, it wasn't one of our better weeks.  Alex had a party in the classroom on Friday, and in hindsight, I suspect all things were leading up to that party.  I kinda sorta knew it, but couldn't wrap my brain around all he was going through.

Suffice it to say, there were too many changes in one day, too much anxiety leading up to Friday, to the party that afternoon.  Long story short, one of the things that put him over the edge was that they were having root-beer floats for the class party.  I didn't know that till we were home that evening and talking.

"Hey hon, how'd the party go?"  I asked, knowing my answer was going to be the shortest one possible....

"OK."

"Well, did you eat something?  Don't you usually have some kind of snack at these parties?"  I knew it was a pretty safe question and one he can easily answer.  It's a straight out fact, so he does OK.

"Mom, they had root-beer floats but I didn't have any.  I was very disappointed in the teachers and the other students.  They were drinking root-beer but I didn't have any.  I didn't think you'd want me to have it.  Mom, they were drinking beer," he whispered, like he was letting their secret out.

He was upset.  He was near tears, exhausted and worn out.  He didn't have a meltdown, he just was defeated, confused.

After a long day, this is what broke me---seeing him that exhausted, the literal thinking and all the anxiety that came with misunderstanding.  He thought it was real beer.  No one told him, they just assumed he knew....now I'm not assigning blame or fault.  I don't think there is any.  Alex is not one to articulate much so I suspect he kept it to himself and when they asked if he wanted any, he just declined.  

I did send in a note to school letting them know what happened and later that night, I explained what root-beer was and how it's good with ice cream.  That it's really not beer and its OK to drink.  

We settled in for the weekend, stuck to our routine and slowly things turned around.  We watched the rain fall, watched the lightening and counted till we heard thunder and made a few of his favorite meals.

And later I asked, "Hey, do you want to try a root-beer float?"  He looked at me, flashed a smile and said, "Ugggh, mom, you know I don't like carbonation.  It makes me throw up."

This time?  He knew what root-beer was.


Note:  Today is Alex's birthday, he will be nine.  I can't believe how fast time has gone!  I'm going to be busy making brownies with chocolate icing, hanging the Happy Birthday sign but no streamers and wrapping the exact Lego's he's wanted, and seen, so there will be no surprises.  Hopefully, it will be exactly the way he wants it.  




38 comments:

  1. Awww. We had almost the exact thing happen after they studied alcohol at school and I was drinking ginger beer :) Happy birthday Alex! Good luck with the brownies, it sounds like a wonderful birthday.

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    1. Ginger beer! I can just see the shocked look on his face now!!!

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  2. Happy birthday Alex! I hope it is a wonderful day for him, just as he wants it.

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    1. Thanks, he was really happy with the Lego's we got him!

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  3. Happy Birthday Alex!
    Alex, I don't like root beer floats either.
    You are not missing much.
    Carbonation is overated!
    But I'll take a brownie!

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  4. Happy birthday Alex! Many Legos too!

    I only like root beer floats when I make them--I put more ice cream than soda, so they are awesomer.

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  5. My boys don't like carbonated drinks, either. Tate gags every time. It breaks my heart that he got so upset..but I so get it. Hugs.

    Happy 9th Birthday to Alex! I hope he has a great day!!

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    1. Yeah, my kids don't like all the fizz...and the burping after, I can do without that!

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  6. Happy Birthday Alex! Hope your birthday is great! I don't like root beer floats either.

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  7. Happy Birthday, Alex! I hope it's a happy, peaceful day for all of you.

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  8. Happy birthday Alex. I for one think it is great that he was the one kid who knew he shouldn't drink beer. Literal thinking is highly underrated :)

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    1. Yeah, he was so relieved when I told him it really wasn't beer.

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  9. Happy Birthday sweet boy. I hope you get every Lego you dream of! And root beer floats???? Well, they aren't even all that good. =)

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    1. I'm with you on the floats, meh. And thanks, he had a good day. xxoo

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  10. lol. My son thought the exact same thing. And even though we explained that it's NOT real beer, he still refuses to have some. He says that it's "made with too much root." Go figure our kids would think the same thing.

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  11. Trapped in a room full of rule breakers?! Oh that must've been torture. But look on the bright side - Alex will never be the one needing the "Just say no" program, right? ;)

    Root beer is gross anyway. But your baking? Brownies? Awesome with Legos and straight up ice cream! Happy Birthday to the big 9 year old! Wow. Where does the time go?

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    1. I know, I can't believe how big our boys are getting! And you get it, it was horrible for him.

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  12. HBD Alex. And I never liked suprises either.

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  13. Oh, your sweet baby. Poor kiddo. I'm glad things turned around a little. Happy birthday!

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    1. Turned around. He had a good day. Made me happy.

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  14. Aw, happy birthday to your gorgeous sweet boy :-) Poor kid, sounds like you made it all up to him though and he'll now have a happy memory.

    xx Jazzy

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    1. Yeah, he got the lego's he wanted, he even wrote down the lego numbers so I would get it right. :0

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  15. Awww... Happy Birthday, guy! I hope it's everything he hopes for :-)

    And good on Alex with the restraint for peer pressure. I don't think you have to worry about drugs or alcohol with this one!

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  17. While I feel sorry for your angel. This mmg. We have had incidents like this in our house. My youngest son is 12 and has Autism. I love his thought process.I also linked your blog in mine to share with my readers.

    Hugs to your angel!

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  18. Happy happy Bday Alex. Poor ALex, but good on him with sticking to his guns on a principle.

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  19. Happy Birthday Alex! And yes there's been incidents like that here too, and my boy won't drink carbonated drinks either: something to be grateful for x

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    1. I know, right? I see some boys trying to see who can burp the loudest and I thank my lucky stars....

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  20. Hope you had a Happy Birthday Alex. Here in Australia we call the "float" a "spider", and I think root beer is what we call "Sarsaparilla". I'm not fond of Sarsparilla but I do like a "spider" made with Raspberry. When I asked my grandchildren if they wanted a "spider" they made a face at me and said "no, I don't like spiders" so then I had to explain the drink but they still didn't like the sound of it but once I made one for them they liked it. "Spiders" are not a drink readily available in cafe's here, unless in a 50's style Cafe, but are usually made at home. My little grandson Noah has a minor form of Aspergers and has a sensory problem too so I understand how he responds to some situations. We have to explain things to him beforehand so he knows what to expect.

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  21. Aww. Sad! How cute though, that Alex understood he shouldn't have beer. I'm sorry carbonation makes him throw-up. That would probably be the ONLY reason I'd quit drinking Diet Coke. ;)

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