Oh My God I'm on fire! Ouch. Ouch! Somebody put me out!!! Anybody? Anybody?!?

Karen over at Ow, my angst kindly awarded me with a very special award and like a good friend it took me a few weeks to get my act together and claim it.  I'm on FI-YAH.  Or something cool like that.  

Anyway, having the mental acuity of a three year old right now I don't remember how I found karensomtingorother but I'm glad I did.  Among other things, you'd swear we were separated at birth, have the exact same kid and live the exact same experiences.  It's like she's me in another dimension, except she's funnier.  Now I"m stuck on this other dimension thing.  Hey, it could happen.  I could have a portal stone in my back yard.  You just never know....

Anyway, you know the drill.  I tell you seven things you don't already know about me (but now that you've read them you can't get them out of your mind and you'll never look at me in the same light again) and I pass the award on to a few lucky victims.  I'll wait as you scroll down to see if I nailed you.

Now that you're back, here ya go.  A few thing you wished you never knew about me...

1. I like tampons better than pads.  See I told you, you'd never get this out of your head.  Ever.  Your welcome.  
2. I told off Emma's mom from the other day.  I really tried keeping my mouth shut but when she made some lame-ass excuse about cancelling the play-date I Went Off and told her, among other things, she could, "Put it in her daughter's community service log."  Yes, I really told her that.  I'm not proud but Good Lord in Heaven, God Almighty did that feel good.  
3. I'm a summer girl and am not looking forward to winter.  I'm always amazed I made it out of North Dakota alive.  Notice I didn't say sane, just alive?  
4. I don't wake up pretty.  I need a cup of coffee plus a good ten minutes till I am even approachable.  Even then, its best to err on the side of caution.   
5. I'm a total type A with the house.  I like to have everything neat and clean which falls in exact opposition to having three small kids.  
6. I secertly like to bash the neighbor about having a sucktastick yard.  They've had a dead tree in the front yard for over a year.  The real irony?  Even with all the storms we've had (we don't have small storms in Kansas) not a single one has knocked that damn tree out of the ground.  I know it's staying put to spite me.
7. And the last bit of information and a real kicker:  My mom has found my blog.  "Hi mom!!  I'm on to you.  You can quit lurking in the background and stalk me out in the open."  I don't care.  I will not shut this site down and move over to Wordpress like I said I would.  I just started figuring out Blogger and I don't have the mental fortitude to try and learn something new.   

I know there are several of you laughing your ASSES off right now.  Go on, yuck it up.  YUCK IT UP.  I know you're rolling on the ground right now, next to your chair trying hard not to piss yourselves.  Don't you wish you were wearing a Poise right now?

And now I shall exact revenge and name you below.  

Flannery over at Living on the Spectrum: The Connor Chronicles.  You know every meme I get you're going to be next.  I don't know how or why but I always name you.  Now it's more like tradition and I have to name you.  It's gotten to the point where if I don't name you, I'm afraid I may offend you by NOT listing you.  

Grace over at That'sRightISaidIt.Dot.Mom.  What can I say, I love ya lady.  Consider this an easy way to make stuff up, you know, how you love public service perosnelle or something.  I don't know, say what you will, I'll still read it.  I love your blog.     

Allie over at Little Baby Fields.  She is just a sweeite who never cusses, has a beautiful family and I still love her for it.  I often wonder how she can stomach all my F-bombs.  Allie, I am working on it.  

And DeeAnn over at Snippets 'N Stuff.  I love hearing about Cody and her general take on life.  It's refreshing and reminds me how insane I really am.  

There ya go, that should do it.  

Now go on and give me a hard time in the comment section.